Trump: “Only Good Mexicans Are Those Who Work At My 5 Star Resorts”

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When asked about a controversial immigration statement made earlier in his campaign, the real estate mogul stood firm,

“When I said Mexico doesn’t send their best people to America, I meant it. I truly believe they’re bringing drug lords. They’re bringing crime. They’re bringing rapists. But some, I assume are good people. And I assume those good people are bartenders and maids at my 5-Star Resorts.”

The TV personality and former host of The Apprentice explained, “The El Trump Resort is great, just really great. I’ve made many friends here, great friends. The staff knows how to take care of a guest. They always make sure to have a room available for me, even if I’m arriving at the last minute. They love me. I love them. It’s a shame they send all of their horrible, criminal cousins to America.”

Debates waged among El Trump staffers all weekend to decide Trump vice was worse: listening to his insensitive, racially-charged commentary or massaging him after his daily visit to the taco bar.


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