Sperm Whales Found Dead In Florida, Stomachs Full Of Uncounted Bernie Sanders Ballots

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According to a press release from Florida’s Marine Biologist Union, many of the whales had stomachs FULL of uncounted Bernie Sanders ballots, greatly reducing his chances of winning the 2016 election.

The votes could be pivotal in the race for President, in which Hilary leads the democratic nomination by 755 delegates.

“It adds to the inconsistencies from the Democratic Party in Florida.  It just keeps adding to it,” said Florida senator Oscar Braynon.

“They’re being dealt with in a public fashion, an open public process so that everyone can witness it,” said Jerry Gewirtz, the city attorney for Tampa.

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FL Police have taken custody of the ballot-bags until the matter is sorted out.



Written by: Misha Estrin

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11 Comments

  1. I don’t believe this made up story.It didn’t come out in the news at all and the name of the beach they were supposedly found at isn’t mentioned at all. There isn’t a picture or video of anyone taking those Bernie Sanders ballots out of the sperm whales. We need proof of what is being said. A picture of two dead sperm whales isn’t enough.

  2. Oh yeah because Florida’s press release is gonna be in a different language 😂

  3. Story is fake. Check on the very first source. Look up “Florida marine biologist union sperm whale press release”. You won’t find a thing. Not even sure that’s a real organization.

    • THANK YOU MARIAH!!! You’re very, very smart. What would the web do without you?

  4. Didn’t you catch the related story about Bernie having to get 7 birds per rally if he wants press coverage. Lol. . Hey if we can’t laugh at this election… We can’t laugh at anything….

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