Black Lives Matter Releases Sex Tape To Get Media Coverage


Minneapolis Black Lives Matter spokesperson Kandace Montgomery has announced the group will be releasing a sex tape in order to improve public opinion of the BLM movement and the protests that have recently targeted the Mall of America and the MSP airport.

“Our public image has suffered greatly this last year, which is hindering our ability to attract more supporters. Our hope is that this sex tape will show scared, older white Republicans that black people are humans too,” Montgomery said.

According to a source that has seen the sex tape, it shows two black people “going at it.”

“Honestly, there’s nothing too spectacular about the movie” the source said. “It’s kind of boring.”

Montgomery said the action in the film is purposely bland, unoffensive and quick, so that “white people can relate to it”. “We wanted white people to think that we enjoy boring sex too. It’s our hope that if enough white people see this, they will finally understand that we are actually humans, whose lives DO matter.”

Council President Barb Johnson, who represents part of North Minneapolis, said she hasn’t seen the film yet, but looks forward to watching it with her very vanilla husband. “I was very displeased when they were protesting and making our law abiding citizens late to the grocery store and other various errands. But this sex tape, this is something everyone can enjoy from the comfort of their computer chair, without making traffic worse. In fact, it may make it better. I know we don’t plan on going out tonight,” Johnson said with a wink.

Council member Blong Yang, also a representative of North Minneapolis, said “This sex tape is a real game changer for the BLM movement. We’ve seen what sex tapes can do for those struggling with their public image. Look what it did for the Kardashians.”

BLM said the video will be posted on their Facebook Page later today.


Alex Aaron


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