Gop Healthcare Plan Provides Every American With Bootstraps To Pick Themselves Up

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WASHINGTON D.C. – Trying once again to repeal the Affordable Care Act, Sens. Bill Cassidy (R-La.) and Lindsey Graham (R-S.C.) have introduced a bill that would deconstruct the ACA. The revised bill aims to “bring healthcare back to the American

After Translation Error, Mexico Pays $70 Billion For Pink Floyd’s “The Wall”

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August 28, 2017 – Following a tense week of communications with US President Trump, Mexico President Enrique Peña Nieto has accepted Trump’s request for Mexico to pay for The Wall. read more

Colorado Optometrists Say It’s, Like, Totally Fine to Stare Directly at Sun During Eclipse

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With so many tourists travelling through Colorado to get a better look at the sun being partially concealed for two minutes, local optometrists have been offering their advice on how to best enjoy the eclipse. read more

Linkin Park Die Hard Fan Deletes Bad Review of The Song “Heavy”

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Linkin Park’s latest song “Heavy” received a harsh backlash from fans. read more

Cropped Wedding Photo on LinkedIn Lands Man Job Interview

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TEMPE, AZ – Local 24-year-old Justin Jorgenstern awoke at 1:30 pm to a delightful surprise: An email from Morgan Lindley, asking Justin to come in for a job interview. read more

Microsoft Edge Voted #1 Web Browser to Download Google Chrome

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SAN JOSE, CA – The results are in: Microsoft Edge was just voted the #1 web browser to download Google Chrome.
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Healthcare Bill Would’ve Survived If It Had Health Insurance

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Paul Ryan’s healthcare bill had stomach pains all morning. The bill was uninsured so when it arrived at the emergency room to seek treatment, it was sent home and told to take ibuprofen. read more

Unemployed Man Who Wakes Up At 1pm Every Day Upset That Sun Now Sets At 5:30

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Unemployed man Misha Estrin who stays up until 5am every morning watching Frazier re-runs is troubled that the sun now sets at 5:30.

Fidel Castro, Dead at 90 Leaves us a Powerful Message About Dangers Of Smoking

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The death of highly immune communist ruler Fidel Castro leaves us with the message that smoking can kill you. read more

Photographer Paid In “Exposure” Taking Too Long To Upload Photos

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Photographer Austin Smith was recently given a “great opportunity” at “career-changing” EXPOSURE read more