Gop Healthcare Plan Provides Every American With Bootstraps To Pick Themselves Up

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WASHINGTON D.C. – Trying once again to repeal the Affordable Care Act, Sens. Bill Cassidy (R-La.) and Lindsey Graham (R-S.C.) have introduced a bill that would deconstruct the ACA. The revised bill aims to “bring healthcare back to the American

After Translation Error, Mexico Pays $70 Billion For Pink Floyd’s “The Wall”

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August 28, 2017 – Following a tense week of communications with US President Trump, Mexico President Enrique Peña Nieto has accepted Trump’s request for Mexico to pay for The Wall. read more

Healthcare Bill Would’ve Survived If It Had Health Insurance

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Paul Ryan’s healthcare bill had stomach pains all morning. The bill was uninsured so when it arrived at the emergency room to seek treatment, it was sent home and told to take ibuprofen. read more

Fidel Castro, Dead at 90 Leaves us a Powerful Message About Dangers Of Smoking

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The death of highly immune communist ruler Fidel Castro leaves us with the message that smoking can kill you. read more

Dip in Trump’s Poll Numbers Due to Supporters Who Died in Firework Related Accidents

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-Donald Trump’s poll numbers have plunged to new lows after thousands of his supporters died in firework related accidents this 4th of July weekend. read more

Woman Runs Over Boyfriend With Car After Learning He Supports Trump

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PHOENIX — When Misty Lee Wilke realized the man she had been having a sexual relationship with was a Trump supporter, she ran him over with a Mustang, according to court records. read more

Uncounted Bernie Sanders Ballots Found In Toddler-Eating Gator’s Stomach

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Police divers on Wednesday recovered the body of a 2-year-old boy who was grabbed by an alligator in front of his family during a vacation at Walt Disney World in Orlando, Florida. read more

Trump Agrees to Debate Bernie on Topic of Whether or Not They Should Debate

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After over a week of silence, Republican Nominee Donald Trump has responded to demands that he debate Bernie Sanders. While the business tycoon had initially been against the idea, he has since stated that he could be pursued by a

Hillary Clinton Criticized For Being Abducted by Mothership Worth $19-Trillion During Speech on Inequality

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Hilary Clinton has come under fire for being abducted by her $19,002,111,230,332 mothership during a speech about inequality. read more

Walmart’s Back To School Sale Includes Assault Rifles

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Walmart is Selling Guns Again.